Monday, June 22 – Joseph A. Brown, S.J. written for a Jesuit soul friend Joshua Peters, celebrating Joshua’s ordination as a priest on June 20 of this year.
And Here I Stand on Fire
“two women wiped my face
held my hands and stood
with me”
Joseph Brown wrote a poem for me in May 1970 to commemorate my ordination as a priest on the Pine Ridge Lakota Reservation. As long ago as that was, I still carry the poem with me – “Note to a Priest.” 50 years later, Joseph wrote another young Jesuit a poem for his ordination this past Saturday. It means a lot to me that I have a place in this long tradition of strong, serious poems about a moment of commitment taken with uncertainty about one’s future as it begins.
Best to read these two poems slowly, with pauses. Perhaps slowly enough to imagine the 50 years that connect these two gifts from a first rate poet, Joseph Brown.
Have a blest week,
john sj
Post #1 – And Here I Stand on Fire (June 20, 2020)
“As they led him away they took hold of a certain Simon, a Cyrenian,
who was coming in from the country; and after laying the cross on him,
they made him carry it behind Jesus.” (Luke 23:26)
Oh I know the story
that somehow I was seized by the soldiers
to walk
behind him
the burden of the day
heavier by far
than a single bar of wood
But I know
how I fell out
into the road
as they pulled him along
My breath caught my throat constricted
water streaming down my face
Oh I know
He stumbled he shook
he groaned
and I looked into his bloody eyes
They never seized me
He did
I grabbed the wood
I could not lift him
from the dirt I could not leave
I could only see his back his legs
II.
When the stumbling stopped
the beasts
pushed me back into the crowd
two women wiped my face
held my hands and stood
with me
until the silence and the dark descended
III.
They brought me to the hall
Men I did not know made me bathe
drink what little wine they could spare
It was not sleep
it was a falling into nothing
I could dream
IV.
Days and nights made
no difference
V.
Please let me cry this to you
Again the air grew warm
we all grabbed each other and leaned
into fear
the door disappeared
and I saw
His eyes
his eyes
as steady as a fisher’s net
pulled me to him
Again I fell
and never broke the stare
His
hand upon my head
please let me
cry
His hand
and I said
Yes
And here I stand
on fire with his eyes
his hand
upon me still
for the Ordination of Joshua Peters, SJ
20 June 2020
— Luke
Post #2 – Note to a Priest (May 25, 1970)
this is not an easy age to handle mystery and myth
it is a time of disposable gods and quickly fashioned
signs and wonders
we have been brave enough to bury demons or burn them
or lock them into the dark places where they are not
heard
and soon even dead bones will rise without a secret
magic or a silent oath
if you choose to walk among us and allow the smell
of blood to feed your prophecies and move you to
forgiveness your vision is suspect to madness and
we will turn away
we say this we have no need of you we are content
with our earth and our air and whatever gives us life
this has been decided
and yet there is something in us that our courage will
not redeem
we have not outlived icarus and still fear the dark places
if you will stand there and point out the sun we may
come and follow you.
luke 1970